iWrite because i can. Because i have two hands and ten (very beautiful) fingers that allow me to write. Because i have thoughts in my head that i want to write. Because i'm not quite sane. Because i am me :)

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

I Stare Out The Window.

               Every morning on my way to school and noon time on my way back,i sit on either side of the sixth seat from the bus driver.I put my headphones on and play loud music,i rest my head on the cool glass of the window, stare out and remain that way till i get to my destination.
                           I ignore everything and every one,their early morning chatter does not interest me,neither do their noon time jokes and loud music. They wonder why i do not talk and i smile to myself, little do they know that  my mind takes me to place they cannot imagine,to a place where my problems do not exist,where i am happy and surrounded by the ones i love.

                           Scenery whizzes by but i do not see, Music plays but i do not hear, i am stuck in a gleeful limbo.................

I feel a tap on my shoulder....bile rises in my throat,i clearly do not want to be disturbed but i turn all the same...its Tolu, ' whats wrong' he asks....'nothing'..... 'but you look sad'...'im fine'.. 'sure???'  ...he persists.....'yea' (i plaster the best smile i can muster on my face) and turn back to the window.

                         Some  days,i am so frustrated,i am tired of smiling and pretending to be happy all the time,im tired of being energetic,of trying my hardest to smile when people hurt me, even when my fingers make fists so tight i feel my blood stop and my heart pounds in my ears and the sting of tears in my eyes,i smile. On those day which are sadly becoming frequent,i am afraid of the bus.
Because once i get in,the battle starts, me against my tears...i fight as hard as i can,keeping my face to the window as hard as possible so no one sees my tear-rimmed eyes.More often than not,i lose. The Hot angry tears gushing down my cheeks. I Cry and cry, iv never felt so alone in my life.

                    I wish for my friends,my real friends not the ones i smile at and play with here but the ones i left behind,the ones that woud know something was wrong before they even see my face.They know im sad,they hear it in my voice when we talk,they sense it in my words when we I.M. 

           I want some one to talk to, someone to listen to my ramblings without interrupting, someone to just hold me and let me cry my frustrations away. Pompom listens to me at night,he listens to my heartbreaking cries, muffled so my roomie doesn't awake, he tries to hold me but he's just a gay teddy so he gets distracted by Fubzy (roomies teddy)

            The crush is dying,slowly fading away, slowly because im trying to make it last a while. The magic  left 2 days ago leaving behind all the ugly truth i tried not to see before.Like fallen glass,it was whole for a really long time and then broken in a single second,in the blink of an eye but the damage had already been done.i wish it wouldn't go because it was mercifully distracting but the more i fight it,the faster it goes.

                I cannot sleep well,i have bin tossing and turning all night long till the sun rises,i feel more tired than when i slept of. I discovered pain relievers could clear your mind and leave you blank if yu took four at a time,i discovered that taking those four with soda left my mind refreshingly blank and carefree. I do not leave home without them. I reach into my purse at the slightest sign of stress,when im sad or angry like today,i reach into my purse.Two first,5 minute interval,Another two,Can of soda and 10 minutes later im hyperactive...i dont mind,anything is better than being unhappy.

...............I am WIERD.....i know but i like it, thats the way i was made so if you have a problem with it then you should know that i really don't care......and if you keep pissing me off...i will punch you....and break your fucking nose...if your lucky..i'll aim for your Guts..
i miss my mom so much ryt now

                  I'm going to eat Lays,Drink punch and read Teen Vogue till i pass out. And tomorrow morning,as always,i will stare out the Window.

                                                           * Kisses*




Friday, November 13, 2009

I Write Because I Crush

The sweetest,most distracting thing in this world.Crushes come in so many forms,they start in so many ways.

A smile from a stranger,a face in a magazine or even on a billboard or t.v,even a friend or acquaintance,perhaps you looked a their faces a bit differently  for no real reason.
It might not even be a face, sometimes,you hear a persons voice,you read a persons words and it feels like a match made in heaven.
No matter the kind of crush you have,the feelings are always the same.Love (what you think is love but is actually lust),Desire,Longing..and the Forbidden feeling of crushing after something thats not yours,something that you want so badly to belong to you,an almost painful yearning.
Your thoughts are occupied by this person,you feel a sudden connection to this person,you want to know more about this fascinating person,you imagine a whole personality for your crush.
Crushes bring an extra spring to your step,a blush to your cheeks,smiles are never far from your lips,your feet keep tapping to the senseless toneless tune that you cant seem to stop humming,the last thing on your mind before you fall asleep,they possess all your dreams and still remain the first thing on your mind when you awake,time has no meaning or boundary,it just you and your crush.

Crushes are ever so distracting,you leave the taps on,burn your food,leave your iron on,misplace every single thing you own,forget even the simplest things like your own phone number....yet,you don't notice these things,they make no difference to you because you have a crush and thats all that matters.
You idolize your crush,your crush is faultless in your eyes,you make up excuses for all their flaws,ignore it even,blame the flaw,blame the world as long as its not your crush, everything is gonna be just fine.
And because most of the time,your crushee never actually knows he/she is being crushed on,you admire from a distance,if the person is already your friend,thats makes it all the better.You read meaning into every word or touch....create fantasies out the words...
Every day,you look forward to seeing the crush,imagining great things happening,and then wen you finally see the person............
because its all been in your head,all the feeling,emotion,everything isn't real and you feel a crushing disappointment and a brief defeat to the real world..and for a microscopic second your come back to senses and realize that you are being irrational and you lick your wounds a bit.....but only for a microscopic second...then it all starts again..
on and on and on and on
..the cycle keeps spinning
then one day
You realize that your crush is nowhere as amazing as you thought they were,that they aren't as good looking,or as fun or nice as you thought.
They might be downright annoying even.
You realize how dumb you've been.
then you promise never to do that to yourself again
Until you meet your next crush
And even if you were lucky enough to get your crush
it'll never work out,you know why??
cuz crushes are too real,you have so much emotions already,all the longing,want,Lust,
the tiny bit of relationship you have with your crush will never be able to stand,because you'd already have so many high expectations.
To crush or not to crush????

I cannot stop watching trey songz -I invented sex

and Lady Gaga-Bad Romance
Happy buffdae Lloyd Henry Umeh!!


Thursday, October 29, 2009

Random Ish

okay...im goin to begin from the point where i left naija,
so,the day of my departure came and sadly,i wasnt feeling anything...yu know wen yu dont want something to happen so yu just ignore it??
Thats exactly what i was doing,i hadn't packed, hadn't loosened my hair,i woke up LATE as usual..
To anyone else,it was just another typical day.I had already made it crystal clear to everyone that i wasn't going anywhere near Canada.

Right when i was in the middle of a very sweet daydream about the delicious indomie i was going to cook for breakfast,i heard mumsy calling me...
I knew what she wanted to say before she even opened her mouth,
she begged,she pleaded,she talked about making the family proud,she talked about how the plane ticket would be the second one to waste in the space of a week (i missed the first flight purposely)
she blamed me,she blamed herself.
She knew i would crack,she just didn't expect it to take 2 hours,she had given up hope when i eventually said i would go
The mixture of shock and delight on her face made me feel like such a bad person.
We had so much to accomplish in so little time
Since i was being exiled to college *sigh*,i had to wear a uniform..arrgh
we had to shop for some stuff before i left,i wasn't planning on going to school on the first day without a uniform....also..since they didnt actually think i was leaving the country,they hadn't wasted  money to book tickets for themselves *shock*..so i was leaving the country by myself....
we shopped and shopped and shopped and shopped...i was in a bad mood and i was so tired of trying clothes on that i simply told the sales people i didn't like the clothes they were holding rather than try them on,
so after almost a whole day of shopping,i had very little to show for it..
at 6.00pm,we were supposed to check in since my flight was leaving by 11pm.
i nonchalantly asked my mum about my hair
Mum-'Oh My God....You Haven't Made Your Hair!!!'
next thing i know we were speeding to the nearest salon..
Mum  -please loosen her hair as fast as possible!!
Salesgirl  - Madam,we are bout to close oh,it will cost oh!!
Mum  - Any amount please,just loosen her hair,im coming back in the next 30 mins and her hair should be finished!*
i stood by the door,watching this exchange,

Tuesday, October 27, 2009


new post coming in a few days....iv bin away for so long and i didnt realise how much i missed blogging...im in canada now tho....il respond to all my comments and read evryones blogs and i was on blogsville gist so thanks guys....watch this space!!

Saturday, October 17, 2009


  • ♥ rememberin someone special today......its bin a year since yu left us ,still feels lyk yesterday,still hear yur voice nd the things yu used to say...lyk yu cudnt wait to dance at my wedding cuz id grown so big. ♥ ♥ if my tea...rs cud build a staircase nd my memories a lane,yu kno id walk ryt up to heaven jst to bring you back again... i miss and luv yu...sleep well,till me meet to part no more... Rest In Peace! xx

Monday, October 12, 2009

Sad Again!!??

okay.......................first of all....i just spent the last 3 hours on skype,with 5 diff people in jand...and i feel soo demoralized ryt now....the pep talk iv bin giving myself these past few days has flown outta d window.
Its bad enough knowing that its going to be terribly boring in canada without every one reminding me constantly.
the fact that i know at least 25 people having fun in jand and absolutely no one having fun in canada makes it worse.
YES,i know its colder than jand!
YES,i know i hate cold
YES,i know a million other things that i do not want you to keep reminding me.
if your friend is sick,would you tell her stories bout all the people that die of sickness??
i dont think so!!!
rather,you'll try to comfort the person,focusing on only the positive and not the negative.
i seem to have stumbled into a place where there seems to be no positive and every one is quick to point out the negative.i think i need some serious cheering up cuz i feel lyk screaming my head off!!!!
I also seem to have lost my prom gown!!
i was peacefully relaxing oh,when mumsy came and asked me where i'll keep my prom gown before i leave.
this is the kind of trick question she likes asking someone when the person is on her own,so that she can start to frustrate the person......
..i asked myself  WWJD WWMS (what would mum say)
 ''i'll keep it in your room for safekeeping''
mumsy smiled and i heaved a sigh of relief,i ddnt want another lecture on how much the dress cost.
As i watched her walk away,i realized that i hadnt seen my gown since prom..
i ransacked my room,checked every nook and cranny of the house,i still ddnt find the dress.
i even checked mumsy's room,i ddnt find it....
i was frustrated,i started checking my handbags sef,desperation has no limits after all,thats how i found a dry cleaning receipt in one of my bags
ITEM- 1 ball gown
PRICE- N1500
i was speechless
since july oh,this is october we are in!!!
the memory came back to me..after prom,i had given the house-help the gown to take to the drycleaners and she lost her father a few days later and had to go back to her people....she hadnt thought to remind me about the gown,and for some weird reason,i had completely forgotten about the gown for almost FOUR MONTHS
I dont even know where the dry-cleaner is....i know its within walking distance because the househelp walks there on the regular and she doesnt take time.......
BUT,i dont go out on my own oh....too much fear.....
but at the same time i dont want mumsy to know iv misplaced the gown

but what if its no longer at the dry-cleaners??
this is one of my ugly pics so you can be liking to ignore my face and look at the gown.lol.
i dunno what to do yet??
Anyways,Naomi was gushing to me about her booboo when i felt this strange feeling
i think im actually tired of being single (gasp)
i told naomi as much,see the way she twisted my arm when i said it,jeez!!
Me : ouch,what did you do dat for? it hurt!!
Naomi :cuz your soo annoying,its when you're leaving that your feeling sad abi??
too bad..its too late for you!!!!
its soo nyc to have such a stupid supportive (coff coff) friend lyk her..lol


Friday, October 9, 2009

Call Me????????????

deres this guy that seems to have a thing for me......he also such a bad boy....i know i shudnt,cz i know what he did to other girls....imma call him Cee....hes a confirmed FLIRT.
.........so wen he started flirting with me,i knew wat to expect....i decided to go along with him for a bit (dont blame me)...i have to say,the guy is damn good with his words...he knows exactly what to say...and i think i actually started to like him a teeny tiny bit...
.........im d kinda person dat everyone comes to wiv their guy problems.......d problem is that iv never had the problems dey bring to me,i just use my god given sense to provide solutions and it works for dem so go figure.....
.....newaiz,due to my skillz in d boy department (coff coff)......i decided to play along,just to see how bad this bad boy really was....he was smooth alright,so smooth that i found myself  questioning the things id heard bout him.he was always sweet,called me twice a day everyday...he was perfect.
he was usually the first and last person i spoke to each day,cuz i was a late riser and a late sleeper so he called to wake me up and he called to say gudnyt....
One day,i woke up to realize that he hadn't called,i double checked my phone just to make sure there where no missed calls,none!!
i thought of calling him ,but i decided not to because that would definitely prove that i cared.
and so i waited and waited and waited....i became restless and irritable..waiting for my phone to ring..
i mean the guy had called me every morning for the past two weeks...so y hadnt he called me yet??
i resisted the urge to call him once again and decided to watch cartoons with my baby sisters to take my mind of it for a bit...coincidentally,d stupid cartoon was  about a girl waiting for a guy to call her..it was soo funny cuz the girl was goin crazy,waiting for the guy to call and she sang this song
When will he call me??
When will my phone ring??
i feel my sanity is hanging by a shoe-string
When will he cal me??
How long is soon?
Should i check my watch or calender or phases of the moon??
and he doesn't have to call me
he can e-mail me or text me
hanging by my phone really vexes me
and the song really gets desperate.....it got me thinking bout guys and girls in general.
why do girls read deep meaning into everything??
why do guys NOT read deep meaning into things??
the girl was killing herself  by the phone while the boy was asleep
why couldn't she relax for a bit??
why didnt he remember  that he had promised to call her?? 

....anyways,the long and short of the story is that the guy proved every single thing id heard bout him (and the ones i didn't hear ) were absolutely true..
On a lighter note,mumsi canceled my flight,i told her i wasn't leaving this country without saying bye to jacquie and alexia(my sisters) so we are going to visit them this week..its not easy having four sisters oh!!
who else would i fight with in Canada...i need jacquie and all her 14 years of stubborness,
alexia-my partner in crime,
imah and her whining (who else would have time to make her stop crying?)
and i was finally traning  ife to be a lady,i hope she wont be a full-fledged tomboy when next i see her....
see me see wahala

i haven't left yet and im missing them already.
thats all i have in my system now

Thursday, October 1, 2009


sooo,i got my canadian visa,not sure im happy,i mean i heard its really hard to get......infact im not happy bout it.......was really hoping to jand....and i leave this weekend...............sigh.......not happy at all......

oh.........and happy independence day in arrears!!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Bad to be single??

......sooo..i was chilling at home watching cartoons with my sister (you shud try watching cartoons sometimes,its relaxing)anyways,my fone rang and i looked at i.d. ...jojo....shes one of my classmates dat i was really gud wit in skul but we hadn't communicated once in the 3 months since graduation,so naturally i was excited,we yarned for a bit den she got down to the true nature of her call..

Jojo: vee,dyu remember dat pic we took on grad day

Me: yeah i do wat happened?

Jojo: and do you remember my cousin dat came back from america

Me: you mean Michael??
(at dis point i already know were dis is going)

Jojo: yeah err, i dunno how to say this

Me:he wants to go out on a date with me??

Jojo: yh and i gave him your number and i know you don't like it and im sorry

...........blah blah blah...iv alredy made the point i wanted to make
.......>>>anyways the micheal did call,and for joans sake i gave him a chance but he ended up not being my kind of person

thats what my best friends call 'THE EXCUSE'.....because iv bin single for almost a year now and have turned down no less than 25 guys because they were 'not my type'

....wen i say not my type...i mean to say that their ideas are too different from mine to make any sense at all....

e.g...i met one guy at a party...for privacy's sake ill call him Tee. so anyways,he was the friend of a friend and we danced a bit and the whole ish,sha we got to talkn and he decided that the best way to woo me was to impress me with money talk......and so on and on he talks...bout his phones...and his cars(his fathers cars) and houses and all the counties hes traveled to and offering to buy anything i set my eyes on if it so pleased me...i politely excused myself and avoided him thru-out the party but through the mystical power of boys,he still managed to get my number and worse yet my address and the worst of all fact was that he lived in walking distance of my house...
...........i wont bore you wiv d details sha but my friends almost ate me alive,dey ddnt want to understand how i cud pass up a cute rich guy dat wanted to spend all his time and money on me(deir words not myn)....

or another cute guy whom i shall call Em,he was only interested in my pretty face and how much he cud get from me..he was basically a sex-addict...everytym he called d first thing he wud ask me is 'what are you wearing'...i mean no 'hello' or 'how are you doin'....it was gross
then der was Es (i know im not good at codenames lol)...he was such a pest,he tried the money method,it ddnt work den he began stalking me...he made my life a living hell....he showed up almost everywhere i went,called and textd me till i was scared of turning on my fone...he sent me huge amounts of credit daily and sent other gifts thru my friends....he was a pretty boy (one of those boys dat r so pretty dat yu wish dey wer girls)and my friends thought he was being cute wen i complained of his stalking but they only spoke lyk dat because they were gettn monetary benefits from Es to convince me to go out with him....i went thru dis for 5 and a half good months before i lost it on him wen he conveniently showed up at an outing i went for...then he reduced it but it still took him another month before he finally accepted dat nothing on earth would make me go out with him and dat was just this june...he still texts and calls but its lyk once in two weeks now....so im hoping the end is near..lol...THIS IS REAL..DNT THINK I MADE IT UP
.....>>>My friend Ronnie thinks im hot-tempered because i dont have a boyfriend
.....>>Naomi thinks dat il feel better about being single if she tells me every detail bout her boyfriend and their numerous escapades
.....>>Kechi thinks i blog because i need a boyfriend (not that she has one..lol)

.......then recently a very good guy friend told me dat "people" said i liked playing 'hard to get' cuz im pretty....it upset me alot because i hate the words and because nobody ever sees things from my point of view.My friends say i have 'high standards' but i dont....
...... MY TYPE OF GUYS are basically just simple guys dat can do simple things lyk make me smile,listens...etc...basically the same things as almost every other girl.
..they don't have to be cute because i have met ALOT of cute guys with no sense,im a teen,i have parents and im not looking for a husband just yet so i don't really care whether he/his father has money or not and he doesn't need to stalk me...
.........its not my fault that i havnt met a nyc person yet,im single and im okay with it...if i meet a nyc person along the way then yay me but if not then im perfectly okay just the way i am....
....iv really written a lot more than i planned to,lol
gotta go
see ya on the next post

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Sharks in the water!!!

...........firstly yesterday was my sister Emma's birthday...she turned 5 and she really wanted to swim...so we decided to go swimming.... you need to see Emma...really excited to swim...she wore her swimsuit immediately after having her morning bath around six-ish oh...we had to keep explaining to her dat it was too early and we wud swim after church (it was sunday)sooo emma decided dat if she cudnt swim she wudnt go to church....we begged emma,promised her heaven and earth but the girl no gree...serious ajebota dat she did for us dat morning.... spoiled brat dat she is,my mum eventually conceded to her and we ended up not going to mass dat morning.....

.........okay,tym to go and swim,as we wer about to go outside,d gate man came to report d usual sunday unannounced visitors....those visitors that will wake up peacefully in their houses and open their kitchens..nothing to eat..dats wen dey know dey will go and visit people..and my family..with six children,ders always something to eat and so the people must always come..

.....as emma saw these visitors,my mums distant friend and her daughters..she come vex ehn...she went to the woman and sed "you people can come back tomorrow ehn,yhu hear,ders big cockroaches in the house dats why we r running away..so come back tomorrow wen dey hav died okay??"

........but the visitors still stayed for close to two hours,leaving after eating a great deal of rice and juice....
..........finally we wer off,we got to the damn pool,emma was damn near vibrating at the site of the pool..so she finally went in...
....den the complaints started
.....HOLD ME
...the problem is dat she was screaming so loud she was a spectacle to behold...
...she sed sumthing touched her leg in the water and therfore it was a shark..not a fish oh..a shark...
>>>...next thing my mum was screaming HELP IFE..HELP IFE..nd so i turned to find my 2 year old sister strapped to her life jacket floating in the deep end WITH HER EYES SHUT....
.....all the worst case scenarios flashed thru my mind,'had she drownd wen no one was watching?'..i grabbed a floaty and rushed over to her...to discover to my utmost surprise dat she had falln asleep in the middle of the water..WTF...
.........and dats how it went...my mum decided to force us to attend evening mass since church was nearby...OMG....i was sitting in church wiv my swimsuit (a one piece thankfully) a short skirt and flip flops...with wet hair,damp body,shivering...boy did the wardens eyeball me dat dey...lol

.............. Mehn uare hot and sexy and would luv to know u better, well am demola by name and u

and could u let me have ur phone no pls and where on earth do u stay?

reply sexy

........... i logged onto Facebook and dats the message i saw in my inbox...WTF is wrong with guys??? does dis guy really expect me to respond to his message or to accept his friend request for that matter??
........guys are really scary these days...i mean i wud b walking on the road and some pervert wud come and start introducing himself and telling me dat he wants to know me??..come on guys..step up yur game.>

..........does such a guy really expect me to stop and start telling him :yes,i also wanna kno ya,dis is my number call me,lets have lunch??:.....wen pigs fly
.....................i think dats all i have in my system for now
as always
i remain

Saturday, August 15, 2009


hello fellow bloggers....sorry for not blogging...iv bn havn teenage hormonal crisis

..........soo yesterday i stumbled upon the the story of a girl named hiedi (hydee)..the story broke my heart and i need to share it because it has burdened me since i saw it

....Heidi Koseda died in November 1984, aged 3 years old. She had been starved to death in a locked room in Hillingdon, west London. Her step father, Nicholas Price, claimed during his trial that he had stopped feeding Heidi due to her greediness for sweets in August 1984; he claimed that she then refused to eat food and drink which resulted in her dying in early November. The prosecution alleged that Heidi was placed in the bedroom for at least 2 weeks without food and water, the bedroom door was secured by a broom handle from the outside. Heidi had eaten strips of wall paper & carpet in a desperate attempt to feed herself.

.................who on earth wud do dat to a 3 year old child...i was so shocked dat i decided to research on child abuse...this is wat i foung

......Lisa died in 1982 after a violent assault by her stepfather, Nick Byard, who now protests his innocence.

In november 1981 there was a protection order placed on Liza after his excessive smacking which left her badly bruised, sadly Liza died three months into the protection order.

Both Byard and Lisa's mother claim Lisa's death was caused by an accident. They claim that she fell down a flight of FOUR STEPS at her home,this was supposed to have happend on a wednsday and Liza did not collapse till the following friday.

Lisa's injuries were small bruising on legs and arms, larger bruising to the back of her head and forehead, extensive bruising to her armpit which indicated she was held with some force. further bruising to her
abdomenand bruising to her inner chest wall. Further to these she had a double rupture of the duodenum one of which was completely cut by an great ammount of force applied to the stomach area and pressing the duodenum against the spine cutting it in two. There was also bruising to the spine (internal) kidneys, and very large bruising to the abdomen wall.The other major injury was a massive brain hemmorage which covered one side of her brain and a smaller one on the other side.

The inquest was closed with an open verdict, and the prosecution service at that time did not wish to pursue the case as there was not enough evidence and the case was put to sleep in november 1982.

Years later the police agreed to look at the case again and after a thorough investigation which lasted nearly four and a half years, the case was heard at nottingham crown court in october 2006. Byard was given life in prison and ordered to serve a minimum of thirteen years before being eligable for parole.

....................Brandon Muir was 23 months old when he died on 16 March 2008. Brandon suffered acute peritonitis brought on by a ruptured intestine which had been caused by a a massive blow to his stomach with a blunt instrument. He died with over 40 injuries including extensive bruising and scratches on his body. He looked dehydrated and his eyes were sunken into his head.

Although Brandon had been vomiting brown fluid for several hours and had been sleepy the day before he died, his mother failed to get him medical attention. She had also been seen previously assualting Brandon and swearing at him.

.................Victoria Climbie died aged 8 at the hands of her great aunt, Marie Therese Kouao, and the woman's boyfriend Carl Manning. Victoria was sent to the Uk to escape poverty, but within 18 months Victoria was dead. She was forced to live in a freezing bath in her own excrement. Her hands and feet were bound and she was naked except for a bin liner. She was hit over the head with a bicycle chain, burned with boiling water, regularly beaten with weapons including a belt buckle, hammer and wire, her face was scolded with boiling water, and her body burned with cigarettes. When Victoria died her entire body was covered in scars.

.....................................Nia Glassie died in New Zealand on exactly the same day as Baby Peter, she was aged 2. Nia also died after suffering months of horrific abuse.

Catalogue of abuse

The court heard details of horrific abuse inflicted on the three-year old:

• She had been kicked, beaten, slapped, jumped on and held over a burning fire

• She had been put into a clothes dryer spinning at top heat

• Wrestling moves copied from a computer game had been practised on her

• She had been folded into a sofa and sat on, shoved into piles of rubbish, dragged through a sandpit half naked, flung against a wall and dropped from a height onto the floor

• And she had been whirled rapidly on an outdoor rotary clothes line until she was thrown off.

At one point, she was left lying unconscious for 36 hours without medical attention.

.................After months of being used "as a punchbag", Baby Peter died at age 17-months old.

A postmortem revealed that Peter had a broken back, eight fractured ribs, missing fingernails and toenails, multiple bruises and an injury to the inside of his mouth. He had also swallowed one of his own teeth. The court heard that his back had been broken by slamming him down over a bent knee or a bannister, which would have left him paralysed. These injuries were inflicted by his mother's boyfriend.

In the months leading up to his death, Peter was seen 60 times by health or social workers. He was taken to hospital three times in the months before he was murdered. Peter was last seen by social services on July 30 – when his mother and her boyfriend had smeared his face with chocolate to cover up his injuries.

On August 1 Peter was examined by a consultant paediatrician, Dr Sabah al-Zayyat, who noted that Baby P was too "cranky" and "miserable" to examine. She failed to notice that Peter had 8 fractured ribs and a broken back, injuries that would have left him in terrible pain and unable to move his legs.

At 11.35am on August 3 2007, an ambulance was called to the house. Its crew found Baby Peter already stiff and blue in his cot. He was taken to North Middlesex hospital where he was pronounced dead at 12.20pm.

The Old Bailey heard that he should have been protected by social workers, police and health professionals, but his mother manipulated them with lies.

Sadly it could not be proven who dealt the final blow that killed this beautiful little boy, and so his mother, her boyfriend and the lodger have been charged with 'Causing or Allowing the death of a child', a crime which carrys a maximum sentence of 14 years.

On 22 May 2009 Peter's 'mother' was jailed indefinitely to serve a minimum of 5 years.

The lodger was also jailed indefinitely to serve a minimum of 3 years.

.............................Sanam was 2 years old when she died in May 2008. She died from complications resulting from untreated fractures to her legs. These were just some of the 107 injuries inflicted upon Sanam by her 'mother', Zahbeena Navsarkaand, and her 'mother's' fiancé, Subhan Anwar, before she died. She had fractures to all her limbs, they rubbed aftershave into her nappy rash, locked her in a cupboard and beat her with a metal pole.

......................Lauren Wright was 6 years old when died on 6th May 2000. She was brutally murdered by her stepmother after being let down by every single agency responsible for protecting her in the months before her death. Her stepmother, Tracey Wright, punched Lauren so hard in her stomach that part of her digestive system collapsed. After leaving Lauren in excruciating pain for a couple of days, Tracey Wright, punched Lauren's stomach some more, this time killing her.

..............Leticia Aalayah Wright, aged 4, died after suffering "sustained and brutal" abuse which left her with over 100 injuries equivalent to a major road crash. Cigarette burns, bruises and bite marks were among the injuries found covering Leticia Wright's dead body from head to toe.The abuse continued "until her body could take no more"and the cause of her death was multiple injuries which were were mainly forceful blows to Leticia's head and to her abdomen.

.......................13-month-old Carla-Nicole Bone died after a frenzied attack by her mother's boyfriend, Sandy McClure. Carla-Nicole endured cruel and sustained abuse in the months leading up to her death. McClure force-fed her, holding her nostrils, and made her stand unsupported for long periods in an attempt to get her to walk. He would scoop up her vomit from her bib and put it back on her plate.
When she died she was covered in bruises to her face, forehead, around her jaw, the left side of her torso and her back. She had suffered a fractured skull and swelling of the brain. McClure had flung Carla-Nicole from wall to wall "like a pendulum", splitting her skull, because she was unable to keep her balance.

Amy Howson was Amy Howson was just 16 months old when her father held her over his knee and broke her back in two. The injury led to spinal shock and rapid unconsciousness. Amy died in Decmber 2007 in hospital just hours after the attack.

......................... 5month old baby Brianna Lopez. She died from continuous abuse from her father, mother & uncle who all lived in a trailer with their own parents. She was penetrated anally, & vaginally. She was bitten & punched. She was thrown. On the night of her death she was thrown to the ceiling & hit it, & let drop to the ground twice. She had brain damage, bleeding into brain. Broken legs (old & new)broken back, & ribs. The police that found her needed counselling because they cudnt get ova wat dey saw,one even left the force all together after dat. The family didnt even want to pay 4 burial. The town did. The family put a cage around her grave to stop ppl from showing little baby Brianna her due respects. Even in her death....her "family" disrespected her & felt the need to control her.

................AND SO THE STORYS GO ON AND ON

............Yh i hav baby sibling in my house so i know how annoying dey can be and yes i do smack or punish dem wen needed but wateva i do to dem,i do it outta love
.............these ppl wer just plain sick and sadists...if u research on their full stories,ud find dat most of the perpetrators wernt evn punished properly..
.........if i was asked to judge id say dat evrythn dey did to the kids b done back to dem..den if dey survive it,they shud get life imprisonment as well..


............I remain ::GaGa::

Monday, August 3, 2009

Im Left-handed.....so SUE me!!!!

...im left-handed.....
At dis point most of yhu wud be saying sooo???
Well im left handed AND living in Nigeria
Does it make sense now??
Well..for d sake of all dat is Good,il explain...

Since the day i was born..i have bin left-handed which is not good when yhu living in Nigeria...
Its considered to as a major taboo and i have bin stigmatized since i was little..lemme give yhu some examples

I was always afraid of going to visit my grandma or of her coming to visit us..(at dis point yhu wud wonder what kinda girl would not want to see her grandma)
My grandma had put it into her head dat i used my left-hand purposely to disrespect her...so she set herself out for me...yelling at me weneva i did anything wiv my left hand esp eating..
she wud den tell me to stop eating and use my right hand...a near impossible feat.
she often reduced me to tears and was always at loggerheads with my parents because they had no problem with my *situation* as grandma called it
'Chike...yu are not raising this girl in the proper igbo tradition,will she serve her husband with left-hand??'
My dad would always defend me and reply dat my husband had nothing to do with my left-hand.
Thankfully...bein a botty,i went to a posh school (Corona Primary) wer such things wer either overlooked or not noticed.
My first secondary school was the same (Vivian Fowler) and i was farely free,till my parents decided dat i ws spoilt and dat i needed a reality check..

Holy child college,ikoyi..was selected by my mum so that i could get a catholic upbringing as well....*dats a story for another tym*

Here.teachers went as far as to slap me for submitting notes with my left-hand,collecting or recieving things with my left-hand etc..
i always wondered why i was created with left-hand...

Now yall r wondering y im telling all dis story...well it all leads up to wat happend to me last week....it makes me so angry to think bout it

......Well it all started wen my too bratty sisters Emma (4) and Ife (2) started disturbing for hot dogs and smoothiees....i tell yhu dat wen dese children ask for something,they dont beg oh...they DEMAND and WHINE and CRY and drive evryone crazy till dey get wat dey want....

....so we went to the BARCELLOS in festac becuz dats d only place in festac dat sells nethn closely resembling smoothies

soo..back to my story....we got der..did d usual stuff.(yhu know now..order etc)

...DEN...wen it was tym to pay,i gave d lady d money and do yu know wat she sed??

I lookd at d woman and sed

.......Trust me now...with my posh british accent in full force..d woman knew dat she couldnt push me over....she collected it and after giving me plenty bad eyes,she gave me my receipt and change..and i walked out with my DIGNITY...lol

............WHICH LEADS ME TO ASK??????/
...WHAT ARE NIGERIANS PROBLEMS WITH LEFT-HANDED PEOPLE...i met a fellow lefty and we both had similar sad tales to share.....so i thnk il end dis post here and pour out my anger on other people...

....::::TILL THEN::::....

Sunday, August 2, 2009


i cant remember the exact first day i met opeyemi....but wen i met her,i knew i wud neva forget her.

it was in second term...approximately january 2009...my besties chisom,awelle and i were on our way to goodness knows(it was probably break tym)and opeyemi passed us *actually it was a whole group of ss1 girls dat passed us* and in our regular fashion -as per SS3 girls,we took absolutely no notice of any of them...except our resident idiot awelle(yhu know i love yhu).

awelle- did yhu guys notice those girls?

chisom and i(we cudnt care less)- which girls??

awelle- i cnt believe dat yhu girls ddnt notice them,evryone has been talkn bout dem!!

chisom- den tell us wat happnd for goodness sake..


awelle- those girls are best friends,there also in a clique and they call thmselves BRACES GIRLS....cuz dey all wear braces...

okay i wont bore yhu with evry single detail but yhu sha get the point..

well,yhu kno dat thing dat happens wen someone has bin under yhur nose for years and yhu neva notice it but d day yhu FINALLY see it,yhu keep seeing it over and over..dats wat happened with the BRACES GIRLS...i kept seeing them everywhere i went.
and AWELLE our resident Defender of the Helpless made friends with them so they Automatically became my friends...

well,netym i spotted any of the braces girls (Chinwe,Dansia,and of course Opeyemi), i wud call out braces or any similar sounding thing because dey would always answer.
Desperate boarder dat i was at dat tym,i wud always extract deir ipods or phones from dem and return it weneva their batteries died..
On one such escapade,i went with my beloved basketball team *coff coff* to ikeja and forgot to return opeyemis ipod to her...d next day,she wasnt evn vexd dat i returnd it to her late..rather she just hissed in dat cute way we all know and playfully hit me on my head...and dats how my real friendship with opeyemi started....

every wednesday....ope wud wait outside d dining hall...she adored the donuts and wud neva let us rest till she had extracted some from us..

i remember the day she had her shoes*bright blue*,earrings,wristwatch and hair ruffle seized...i met her outside our class sobbing...i had 2 really plead with debbie dat day to release it...

soon...ope seemed to look sick to me..and weneva i wud see her i wud ask her wat was wrong and she wud always tell me she was fyn...i wud den insist dat she was sick.
it became annoying...'VANESSA FREE THE GIRL JO' awelle startd to tell me..nd i tried to stop sayn it....wer d spirits tryn to show me something???...i wud neva know.

den in about april,wen all the ss3s wer goin home to get ready for jamb and stuff,and opeyemi was standing with me at the gate...i was about leaving and she was sayn all the usual holiday yarn...'write well oh,dont get fat'...
i yelled back 'ope,dont forget my birthday oh'
and with a final wave i was gone
i neva knew dat was the last thing ope wud eva say to me...

On a peaceful sunday,a week or so after writing jamb..i was fuming at d dining table,my brother had wrestled d laptop away from me and i was not happy..
my phone rang and i answered it b4 i realised dat awelle was flashing me AGAIN..

i ddnt want to call her back...but she kept flashing and flashing so i decided to call her back..at least i could rant about how annoying brothers are..so i made the phonecall dat changed my life..

wen i called awelle..she was hysterical and cryn and telling me dat OPEYEMI was DEAD!!
'very funny' i told awelle...but she insisted on it,she told me dat she hrd it from CHISOM.....who also sed dat ope died of sickle cell..
...'but awelle' i sed,'opeyemi DOES NOT have SICKLE CELL'....(in my face).d only sickle cell we know is shalom...mayb its shalom....
awelle tld me dat she knew dat opeyemi DID NOT HAVE SICKLE CELL...but since shalom was also awelles AFAM...she was still cryn

'chisom' dat joker,i assured awelle dat i wud call her and get to the bottom of this.

i called chisom and proceeded to thoroughly harass and interrogate her...
'but Vanessa,i can neva joke with death..opeyemi is dead... Cynthia ogueji told me and she heard it from her sister Juliet dats in ss1 with opeyemi'

OPEYEMI!!! DEAD!!.....'Chisom sorry,i hear yhu but i dont believe yhu'

i called awelle back and relayed the info..adding dat i ddnt belive it..i promised to call her back wen i had more news

i lay on my bed and thought ov wat to do...FACEBOOK....i used my fone to log on and quickly checked the recent status updates......RONKE OYEBANJI--(i cnt remember her actual status but it had to do with the death of her friend)....WHAT TO DO WHAT TO DO?

I got ronkes number of facebook and called her ' YHUR ACOUNT BALANCE IS LOW'...all the calling chisom and awelle over and over again had killd my credit..i cut the fone and checked my credit....50 naira left...do i call first or buy another card first...

i called....'hello ronke this is vanessa and i dont have much credit but please just tell me who died......and just as the fone cut i heard one word...OPEYEMI

dats wen the world stopped....i ran madly across out of the house with tears streaming down my eyes....d same tears running down my eyes as i write this..
i buy credit and rush home...back into my room...sobbing....how can she b dead??

i call ronke back to get the details...SICKLE CELL...ope,yhu neva told us dat yhu had sickle cell..u ddnt evn look it....im so hysterical...i calm down..i still have to call awelle and it wudnt do for me to cry wen she was alredy hysterical

i call and gently break d news to her..i finish my credit consoling her...
i log onto facebook and stare at her pics



OPEYEMI IS DEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WORDS can neva express how much i miss yhu and wish yhu were here...


and thus the story of my first blog begins.....iv always meant to move onto modern technology. i wonder how long il last before runing back to my precious books.i write because......
sooo....i got inspiration for this from my friend who actually has d courage to write and blog as well and has inspired to ....(omg....wat do i think im writing)

The point ov my ramblings is just to say eeeeerrm....HI??